


music to watch boys to

by baneberries



Category: Harry Potter - J.K Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Cursed Remus Lupin, M/M, Remus Lupin Feels, Remus Lupin Needs a Hug, i swear it wasn’t meant to be this way, in poem format, lana del rey - Freeform, poem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-24 16:21:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16178741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baneberries/pseuds/baneberries
Summary: sirius black lives and laughs and loves until remus lupin says it back and then he’s lostakathat one time remus lupin was cursed for life





	music to watch boys to

_i_ _like_ _you_ _a_ _lot_

 

his name was erik once

before he was gone

 

 _singing_ _soft_ _grunge_ _just_ _to_ _soak_ _up_ _the_ _noise_

 

again

 

 _blue_ _ribbons_ _on_ _ice_

 

his memories of him,

his love

 

 _no_ _holds_ _barred_ , _i’ve_ _been_ _sent_ _to_ _destroy_

 

a mixture of bitter and sweet

and lovely and romantic

and pain and cruelty

 

 

 _velveteen_ _and_ _living_ _single_   


and then it was sam,

then douglas, then leonard,

then finally sirius

 

 _lies_ _can_ _buy_ _you_ _eternity_

 

they were the same people,

then not, then back again

 

 _i_ _see_ _you_ _leaving_

 

their faces were the same.

 

 _so_ _i_ _push_ _record_ _and_ _watch_ _you_ _leave_

 

sharp cheekbones, pale skin,

dark hair that curled a little at

the ends.

 

 _i_ _live_ _to_ _love_ _you_

 

eyes stormy grey, eyelashes

longer than what should be

allowed

 

 _and_ _i_ _love_ _to_ _love_ _you_

 

but he was sirius now

and he’ll be whole again

until he met remus who

would utter those three

cursed words—

 

 _i_ _live_ _to_ _love_ _you_

 

— “i love you” —

 

 _i_ _love_ _to_ _love_ _you_

 

—and then it’ll all

fall to pieces again

 

 _i_ _live_ _to_ _love_ _you_

 

and then sirius would

come back to life a

few years later

 

 _i_ _love_ _to_ _love_ _you_ , _boy_

 

he’ll have a new name

 

 _nothing_ _gold_ _can_ _stay_

 

his personality would

change

 

 _like_ _love_ _or_ _lemonade_

 

a little

 

 _sun_ _or_ _summer_ _days_

 

and he’ll live and laugh

and love remus lupin

until remus says those

words back and then

he’s lost

 

 _it’s_ _all_ _a_ _game_ _to_ _me_ _anyway_

**Author's Note:**

> i swear it wasn’t meant to be this way.
> 
> kudos and comments make me very happy.


End file.
